The Rise of My Weight and PopularityHere is my weight gain from 5th to 8th grade:
- Grade 5 170lbs
- Grade 6 185lbs
- Grade 7 200lbs
- Grade 8 223lbs
I could no longer live with my mom after everything she put me through physically. She stopped caring and left, which led me to box myself in the basement on the computer surrounded by multiple fast food boxes, chips, soda and more. I would easily drink a 12-pack of soda a day.
I was emotionally damaged at such a young age. I was your typical weird girl; quiet, shy, and most often awkward. Thankfully, I always had my dad. He is my biggest hero, always wanted to do the best for me.
I enjoyed food, gradually putting on more weight throughout the years. We never ate at home, always out satisfying any craving. I would typically be eating and eating and eating.
Once Grade 7 came around, I started to finally make friends but, why? Well, I could make faces and people found it hilarious, so I rolled with it! Next thing you know there were parties at my house on Halloween, and people coming over everyday. It was like everything had fallen into place, except for my weight.
I remember my grade seven teacher told me "You know, you actually have to run if you want to lose weight, right?" while my classmates were doing our "DPA (Daily Physical Activity)". I have never forgotten it.
I went home that day and cried. I did the thing any teenager would do, to try and not eat. It didn't work, as I couldn't go more than two hours without food.
Grade 8 rolled around fast. Still was that class clown. I did everything for everybody, anything just to have friends. I let people use me, talk behind my back, and I was even there for people when they weren't there for me. I turned into the popular girl, all because I could make fun of myself. It was working for me, but then there were those days where you wake up, take a shower and you cant even wrap a towel around your body.
I went to shop for a graduation dress expecting a size 16. I ended up having to buy a size 22 dress. A 14 year old, 223lbs, in a size 22 dress. It was sad and scary, as I was worried for my life everyday, wondering what would happen if I died of a heart attack. Wondering what would happen if were to be diagnosed with diabetes.
16 years old and scared of death already. I felt so trapped in my body, as if I was slowly dying inside. I was just so happy on the outside; you would never of been able to tell. I always wished that someday I would wake up and just take off the suit I was wearing, wondering how people would react. It was such a fantasy.
In July 2013, we had lost our house and ended up moving to an apartment. Over that summer I lost myself mentally. My mind felt like such a dark hole at night. Eventually high school had come. You walk in and are surrounded by people who judge you, and it feels as if they are looking at the thing you are most insecure about. Fast-forwarding to September 24th 2013, I decided enough was enough.
My dad had applied for the gastric bypass surgery, and was about to go on the 2-week liquid fast prior to his surgery. The night before I sat down and told my dad,
"This is it. I am doing this one last time and please don't let me quit. I don't want to be the only one in this family who's obese. I promise I will do this."
16 years old and scared of death already. I felt so trapped in my body, as if I was slowly dying inside.
Too Young to Be at the GymI always had the issue of being too young to be at the gym. I used it as a excuse...until I finally got my head in the game.
Every day after dinner I would jog around this park. I still remember on my very first day I jogged around the park 5 times, and pushed myself farther than I had ever done before. I kept repeating in my head, "You did this to yourself, you fix it." I repeated that same workout every single day until it eventually was way too cold out.
I then resorted to blasting some music in my room, and jogging back and forth in my small apartment room for a hour...eventually adding in some squats, crunches. etc. I found it was getting to easy for me, and that's when I came across Insanity. I completed that and was down about 60lbs by my 4th month!
I even did T25 in the mornings. I went to my doctor in February and he told me he didn't want me to lose any more weight. It was then that I discovered bodybuilding.
Since February i've been training 5 days a week, while fluctuating my cardio from 2 times a week to 4 times a week depending on how I feel! Bodybuilding was my life-changer.
Eating Small, Healthy and SimpleI kept it with one rule, "If it doesn't move you forward, it isn't worth it." I ate small, healthier and kept it simple.
I remember every morning my staple was Special K cereal with almond milk and strawberries. I eventually discovered Instagram and got pulled into all the fads, low carb, carb cycling, eating clean, you name it....I've done it. It worked for me! --aside from the fact that I discovered I was eating too little when I had hit a plateau.
Every day after dinner I would jog around this park. I still remember on my very first day I jogged around the park 5 times, and pushed myself farther than I had ever done before.So I bumped up my calories. I fell into the typical bro diet. I meal prepped weekly, I would have chicken, sweet potato, ground turkey, steak, brown rice, asparagus, oats, protein powders and make some protein muffins.
I was a person who could eat the same thing for months, and it wouldn't bother me. I believe when dieting there should be discipline...but I never realized how much it messed with my head. I ended up staying away from bread and fruits because of the "sugar."
I realized, I had lost 50lbs just eating less, it didn't matter the food. I got caught up in eating clean but I felt like I couldn't live a normal life. I ended up discovering flexible dieting... and finally found my balance with weight loss. I currently eat around 2200 calories in a very slow bulk.
My supplement stack has basically stayed the same throughout my weight loss other than creatine!
- Whey Protein
- Multi-Vitamin (Gummies)
- Omega 3 Fatty Acids
- Creatine (since August)
I was emotionally damaged at such a young age. I was your typical weird girl; quiet, shy, and most often awkward. Thankfully, I always had my dad. He is my biggest hero
My Biggest Challenge - The Mental Aspect of Weight LossThe biggest challenge was the mental game. I believe that many people have the capability, but when people want to lose weight usually they just are not mentally ready.
I lost a lot of people in my life during my weight loss; people almost forgot about me or wanted nothing to do with the new me. It's like they were supportive when I was slowly dying, but wanted nothing to do with me when I finally was living. The first 3 months of my journey, everyone was cool, but it wasn't until after my name started building that just drifted.
Before I would of seen that as a give in point...but for some reason, I used it as fuel this time. I always said "just make it 3 months" and I finally did. And I wanted nothing more than to make it to my year mark.
My mentality to move forward was what got me to where I am. Never slipped up once! Never gave in to my weaknesses.
Milestones, No More Plus Sizes and BodybuildingI feel like a one of the many major milestones was walking into the plus size store I used to shop at having them tell me they no longer carried my size. Another major milestone was finally feeling some comfort in my own skin. This was something I had been searching for, for years.
One of my biggest milestones, I believe, was when I was introduced to bodybuilding. It has literally changed my life. I mean it's not every day you see a 15 year old girl bodybuilding, so I mean it is a little odd to most. It always makes me laugh when people say "I never could understand how you do this everyday." Bodybuilding made my life something I would never imagined it to become, and has opened so many doors for me.
Well my last milestone (guess its not really a milestone) but something I'm very thankful for is my Instagram. I would never have imagined myself going as far as I have without my Instagram. It built me, and also opened up so many opportunities for me!
I lost a lot of people in my life during my weight loss; people almost forgot about me or wanted nothing to do with the new me.
MacKenzie's Life Now, and New GoalsWell, I'd like to say I live a happier and much simpler life. I can walk into a clothing store or order things online without worrying if they will fit me. I can smile in the mirror, and feel confident in my own skin. I am able to motivate and inspire people daily, and change lives, which if you ask me is one of the coolest feelings in the world.
I attend school, work a part time job, and train 5 days a week. Bulking to gain some quality mass and just enjoying life. Growing up, but growing up living a happier life. Feeling confident.
My new goals are to make some serious gainz. haha! But most importantly to keep inspiring people, and keep changing peoples lives. I want to give people the feeling of freedom and to show people that anything is possible, no matter the age, or whatever obstacle may be in their way. You can literally do anything if you see it happening.
A dream of mine is to keep building my name, and eventually open a studio to work with those who feel like there is nothing left anymore. I hope to keep building my physique and one day step on the Olympia stage!
Connect With MacKenzie Walker
- Instagram: @pinkteenweightloss13